Fun
& Games
From "Outside Jokes" book
of wildlife cartoons
(Copyright: Betty C. Grace)
"But
archery season is closed."
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(Reprinted by permission
of artist)
Editor's Note:
Copies of the "Outside Jokes" book are on
sale through:
The Nature Shop, Missouri Department of Conservation
P.O. Box 180, Jefferson City, MO 65102-018
or call toll free: 887-521-8632
Crossword
Puzzles
When you have completed the puzzles, you can
click here to find
the answers!
Puzzle
#1
| Across |
Down |
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7. taking part in
8. diet essential
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1. inhabitants
2. analyzes light
3. highest priority
4. keeps things cool
5. a part of something
6. corkscrew shape
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Puzzle #2
| Across |
Down |
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1. ways of doing things
4. copy, reproduction
6. especially proper
8. illustrated movie
9. a musical instrument
10. a performing group
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2.
business risk taker
3. humorous drawing
5. event retellings
7. the last act
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Puzzle
#3
| Across |
Down |
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1.
considering options
4. anxiety inducing
5. alone, single play
7. a postponement
8. to face
9. the top choice
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2.
sleep inducing study
3. beyond borders
6. a choice from many
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From
book reviews
| Across |
Down |
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1.
well-known person
5. interfered with
7. not common
8. choose route to fly
9. not proven
10. one who questions
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2. promote slavery
3. to sneak through
4. escapee from war
6. flying of airplanes
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Jokes
How about some animal jokes?
Why is a polar bear a cheap pet?
Because it lives on ice!
Have you ever hunted bear?
No, but I've gone hiking in
shorts!
What does the lion say to his friends before they go out hunting
for food?
Let us prey!
What did the lion say when he ate the comedian?
That tasted funny!
What do you call a lion wearing a necktie and flower in his
mane?
A dandy lion!
What would you call a lion that has eaten your mother's sister?
An aunt-eater!
How do we know owls are smarter than chickens?
Have you ever heard of Kentucky-fried
owl?
What happened when the owl lost his voice?
He didn't give a hoot!
What kind of ant is good at math?
An accountant!
What do you call a 100-year-old ant?
An antique!
Some school jokes
Teacher: What's big and yellow and comes in the morning to
brighten your mother's day?
Pupil: The school bus!
Teacher: Abraham Lincoln had a very tough childhood. He had
to walk seven miles to school every day.
Pupil: Well, big deal. He should have got up earlier and
caught the school bus like everyone else!
Mother: What was the first thing you learned in school?
Daughter: How to talk with my mouth closed!
Pupil: Dad, can you help me find the lowest common denominator
in the problem, please?
Dad: Don't tell me that they haven't found it yet! I remember
looking for it when I was in school!
Mother: Why did you swallow the money I gave you?
Son: Well, you said it was for my lunch!
And, finally, our usual knock, knocks (applause!)
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Safari.
Safari who?
Safari, so good!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Seymour.
Seymour who?
Seymour if you open the door!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Sweden.
Sweden who?
Sweden sour chicken is my favorite Chinese carryout!
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