|
McKissack sidebar
Texts of three original stories
(Editor's note: These are three original
stories by 5th graders at Independence Elementary
School that were critiqued by St. Louis kids' author
Pat McKissack. Young Saint Louis.com covered
the videoconferences between Ms. McKissack and the
kids in their creative writing course. To read the
main story, click here.)
Story No. 1:
"Champion"
By Haley Ernstall
"He's dribbling down the court…he shoots…five seconds
the time…the crowd is cheering and then 'Ohh.' It
bounces off the rim. Well, that's the end of it, folks,"
sighs the announcer.
Kyle walked over to the benches, where his parents
were.
"Great job, Kyle. You did great," said his parents.
"That's not what everyone else thinks," drooped Kyle.
He started to walk away when his team bumped him and
said, "Nice going, Kyle."
He sighed, "I'm never going to make it to the championship."
On the way home, Kyle fell asleep because he was
in Chicago and he lives in Arizona. In Kyle's dream,
he could see a basketball player practicing. "Oh,
My Gosh, that's Shaquille O'Neal," he gasped.
"I heard you lost your game today. When I get frustrated
and think I can't do it, I just never stop practicing.
So, you should practice at least once a day if you
really want to turn out to be the greatest player
you always dreamed of being," he advised.
Kyle jumped up and was wide-awake. "Did you have
a good nap," laughed his dad. "We're about halfway
there. Just a few more hours."
Kyle looked out the window. They were in Colorado.
The rest of the way there, all Kyle thought about
was his dream. Finally, they reached 56th Street where
his house was.
He ran inside where his dog, Sammy, was. Kyle loved
Sammy. He was basically his only friend. It was getting
late, so Kyle and Sammy went to bed.
The next morning, Kyle had another game. He had practiced
ever since he got home and again in the morning before
his game. On the way to the game, Kyle was thinking
about his dream again and how he could be the best
player.
They finally reached the gym. The game was about
to begin. Kyle played in the 1st quarter. He did OK
but he could have done better. In the 2nd and 3rd
quarters, he was on the bench.
Finally, he was in the 4th quarter. There was 10
seconds left. The other team has the ball. Kyle's
team just needs three more points. They passed the
ball to Kyle. Kyle got the ball and ran.
He was almost there. Everyone kept yelling for him
"Slow Down." He was at the 3-point line and there
was someone almost on him. He shot, but he closed
his eyes.
It was very quiet and three seconds were left. He
still had his eyes shut. He heard the timer go off
but the crowd hesitated, then cheered.
Kyle opened his eyes. He had won the game to the
championship. His team ran over, lifted him up and
started to shout, "Kyle, Kyle."
-The end-
Story No. 2:
Ryan's Only Wish
By Kaitlyn Howard
It was around 12:37 a.m. and Ryan was still in the
hospital. He was used to the hospital beds but not
quite used to their clothes. He was sick of not being
able to see his friends even though his only friend
was his Teddy Bear.
He had spent 2˝ years in the hospital. He was five
years old when he started having cancer and he'd been
only home one time. He missed not being able to swim
or play two-hand touch football!!
"Mommy, I can't go to sleep," Ryan said. It was almost
Christmas and Ryan has been wishing he could be home
for Christmas. "Mom, will I be home in time for Christmas?"
Ryan said. "I don't know, Honey. This is one of those
things you never find out," his mother whispered.
Ryan is about 4-foot-2 and is bald due to all the
chemo. The hospital room he stays in has a huge window
and ever night he looks for a shooting star. So far,
he's only seen two. He is always thinking about others
and is used to all of it. He has a new bruise starting
on this leg. As he noticed it, he told his mom. "Mommy,"
he whispered.
Yes, Honey."
"I kind of have a new bruise starting."
"Are you all right, Honey?"
His mom immediately calls the emergency room and
they were up right away. His mom was a tall, skinny
woman with long brown hair and is always worrying
about Ryan. Ryan's dad is in the military and rarely
sees Ryan. The main reason Ryan wants to be home for
Christmas is to see his loving father.
Days pass and Ryan decided to write a letter to his
father so he got out a piece of paper and a pen and
wrote:
Dear Daddy.
When will you be home? I really miss you. Please
write me back.
Love,
Ryan Settle
A week passed and no response. Ryan was sitting in
the cafeteria when a mailman walked up to him and
said, "Are you Ryan Settle?"
"Yes I am Ryan Settle. Do you have a letter for
me," asked Ryan.
"Indeed I do," replied the mailman.
"Thank you," Ryan shouted with glee.
The letter was from Michael Settle and said:
Dear Son,
I miss you and I don't think I'll be back for Christmas
unless a miracle happens. So be good.
With
love, Daddy
Ryan was upset and very sad although he understood.
He thought to himself, miracles can happen. You just
have to believe?
Days before Christmas, a doctor as usual came to
check on Ryan. Everything was fine for the first time
and the doctor said, "Ryan, you might be able to go
home for Christmas."
"For real," Ryan shouted down the hospital hall.
"What's wrong, Honey?" his mom yelled as she was
running to him.
"Nothing. I am absolutely fine, really I am."
"Okay, then what did you want to tell me."
"The doctor said I could go home for Christmas,"
Ryan said in a joyful voice.
"Is that true?" his mom questioned him.
"Yes, Mom. It is," explained Ryan.
Ryan and his mom were flipping through the channels
when they saw the headline: "The Chinese take a break."
Ryan and his mother stayed on this channel and it
said the Chinese and Americans have stopped the fighting.
Ryan and his mom both stopped and looked at each
other for a moment. The next day at nine sharp, Ryan
and his mom returned to their house for the first
time in a while. He was surprised to see a Christmas
tree with presents piled high.
Also Ryan's father was sitting on the couch. "Daddy,
Daddy," Ryan shouted with joy. "How come you are home?"
His dad said that since the Chinese were done fighting
they were allowed to come home.
"I told you myself miracles do happen and I was
right. So, since it's Christmas, do you want to open
presents."
There were wonderful gifts piled him behind him.
Ryan opened all sorts of gifts such as remote-controlled
cars, footballs, basketballs, shirts and pants. The
best gift of all was given last.
Ryan was opening a gift with doggy wrapping paper
when a wet little nose popped out. It was a longhaired
miniature Dachshund. Ryan was very excited and immediately
had a name for her.
"I will name her Ginger." And from that point on
Ryan and Ginger were the best of friends.
-The End-
Story No. 3:
The Lonely Caterpillar
By Alexis Liker
One day, a caterpillar named Kali was squirming along.
She was lonely. She wanted to play with her friends.
But, all of them were big blue butterflies. She felt
left out because she couldn't fly.
She never would become a butterfly, she thought.
So she asked Mr. Ant if she would ever become a butterfly.
But, he said, "No," and went out for some food.
Kali was even more lonely so she took a nap. When
she woke up, she was in a dark, shiny thing. "What
is this?" she exclaimed. "This is new to me. Am I
turning into a butterfly?"
Then, she heard something crack. The dark slimy thing
opened. She hopped out and she started to fly!
She had the most beautiful wings of all her friends.
She flew out and went to show her friends. They were
so amazed. So they played fly tag and Kali the butterfly
never felt left out again.
-The End-
|
