Fun
& Games
From "Outside Jokes" book
of wildlife cartoons
(Copyright: Betty C. Grace)
"There
are largemouth bass and smallmouth bass,
and then there's Mildred--the bigmouth bass."
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(Reprinted by permission
of artist)
Editor's Note:
Copies of the "Outside Jokes" book are on
sale through:
The Nature Shop, Missouri Department of Conservation
P.O. Box 180, Jefferson City, MO 65102-018
or call toll free: 887-521-8632
Crossword
Puzzles
When you have completed the puzzles, you can
click here to find
the answers!
Puzzle
#1
| Across |
Down |
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1. breaking
down refuse
8. creating past event
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1.
honor a memory
2. one's clothing
3. historical items
4. observing
5. old time weapon
6. later events
7. bring back status |
Puzzle #2
| Across |
Down |
|
3. passed into law
5. background summaries
7. call by wrong name
8. evidence offered
9. prejudiced
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1.
make-up of something
2. one's accepted value
3. support statements
4. varied explanations
6. support a project
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Words
from Book Reviews
| Across |
Down |
|
3.
fences, tunnels
4. vacationing visitors
7. animal doctor
9. strange, wierd
11. claimed to be true
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1.
risk taking
2. offer to do a task
5. a tropical lizard
6. not proven to exist
8. far from anywhere
10. enthusiastic
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Silly
Synonyms
| Across |
Down |
|
3.
unbelievable
5. overbearing
6. upset, shock
7. active, unruly
8. roundabout
9. manipulate, scam
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1. lucky
2. talkative, gabby
4. rogue, rascal
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Jokes (A variety this month)
Crazy Thoughts - Have you ever wondered?
What's the difference between a novel and a book?
Could you be a closet claustrophobic?
Where do all the daylight savings hours go?
What would happen if you found a four-leaf clover under a
ladder?
Can a cross-eyed teacher control his pupils?
If you only have one eye…are you blinking or winking?
Why do they have holes in crackers?
Why do we have to pay a toll on "freeways"?
Why is Joey short for Joe when Joey has more letters?
Why is most lunchmeat bigger than bread?
Why do we sing "Take me out to the ballgame" when we're already
there?
Do one-legged ducks swim in circles?
Some dumb warning labels on products
Dremel Electric Rotary Tool
This product not intended for
use as a dental drill
Arm & Hammer Scoopable Cat Litter
Safe to use around pets
Bowl Fresh
Safe to use around pets and
children, although it is not recommended
that either be permitted to drink
from the toilet
Baby Oil
Keep out of reach of children
Hair Coloring
Do not use as ice cream topping
Dial Soap
Use as regular soap
Electric Hairdryer
Do not use while taking shower
Kamatsu Floodlight
This floodlight is capable
of illuminating large areas, even in the dark
More Silly Book Titles
Acrophobia Explained
by Alfredo Heights
Crackdown
by Laren Order
Armed Heists
by Robin Banks
Daddy, Are We There Yet?
by Miles Away
Bad Cow Jokes
by Terry Bull
Desert Crossing
by I. Rhoda Camel
Eating Disorders
by Anna Rexia
Brain Surgery Maid Simpel
by Sarah Bellum
Explaining It Better
by Clara Fie
Chest Pains
by I. Coffalot
I'm Someone Else
by Ima Nonymous
Knock, Knock Jokes (Thank goodness, this ends it!)
Knock, Knock.
Who's there?
Accordion
Accordion who?
Accordion the weatherman, it's supposed to rain.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Iowa.
Iowa who?
Iowa lot of money to the government for taxes.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Sarah.
Sarah who?
Sarah doctor in the house?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Police.
Police who?
Police stop telling these stupid knock, knock jokes!
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