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St. Louis' Webzine for Kids
Text Only
November 2008 Vol. 9 Issue 11

Fun & Games

Fun & Games

From "Outside Jokes" book of wildlife cartoons
(Copyright: Betty C. Grace)


"Rats! We play the herons in the first game."

(Reprinted by permission of artist)

Editor's Note: Copies of the "Outside Jokes" book are on sale through:
The Nature Shop, Missouri Department of Conservation
P.O. Box 180, Jefferson City, MO 65102-018
or call toll free: 887-521-8632

Crossword Puzzles
When you have completed the puzzles, you can click here to find the answers!

Puzzle #1

Across Down

1. a pamphlet
4. good characteristics
8. letters, missives
9. ink lettered

2. straightens teeth
3. started, sent off
5. city area
6. ones who live within
7. hard to resist
9. a catchy phrase


Puzzle #2

Across Down

4. quality of writing
5. true to life
7. bow and arrow sport
8. outstanding
9. wall paintings

1. the correct method
2. postponed event
3. supporters
6. obstacles
7. fishermen


Puzzle #3

Across Down

5. very small
8. legislature related
9. an unpaid worker

1. red plum-like fruit
2. people's beliefs
3. almost entirely
4. studies life forms
6. to name or specify
7. illegal drug


From book reviews

Across Down

1. one in training
4. appointed, chosen
6. can't do without
8. from another nation

1. to murder or kill
2. often retold story
3. mistreatment
5. not refined
7. at edge of city

 

Jokes (a few riddles to begin)

What English word has three consecutive double letters?
     Bookkeeper.

Can you spell rotted with two letters?
     DK.

What did Tennessee?
     What Arkansas!

Why don't dogs make good dancers?
     Because they have two left feet!

How can you get four suits for a dollar?
     Buy a deck of cards!

Puns

What do you get when you drop a piano down a mine shaft?
     A flat minor!

Why is a pig's tail like getting up at three in the morning?
     It's twirly!

What do you call an unemployed jester?
     Nobody's fool!

What's a Hindu?
     Lays eggs!

Two peanuts were walking down the street. One was assaulted…

Thoughts to Ponder - Have you ever wondered?

Why it's necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?

Why you never see the headline "Psychic wins lottery"?

Why doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why the man who invests all your money is called a "broker"?

Why don't they make the whole plane out of the same substance that the indestructible black box is?

Can fat people go skinny-dipping?

So what's the speed of dark?

Why are the copyright dates on movies and television shows written in Roman numbers?

More Book Titles

The French Chef
     by Sue Flay

Tight Situations
     by Leah Tard

Is O. J. Guilty?
     by Howard I. Know

Unemployed
     by Anita Job

Off to Market
     by Tobias A. Pigg

French Overpopulation
     by Francis Crowded

Handel's Messiah
     by Ollie Luyah

Look Younger
     by Fay Slift

Downpour
     by Wayne Drops

Cloning
     by Ima Double

Irish Flooring
     by Lynn O'Leum

No!
     by Kurt Reply

Knock Knock Finale

Knock, knock.
     Who's there?
Normal Lee.
     Norma Lee who?
Norma Lee I don't go around knocking on doors!

Knock, knock.
     Who's there?
Water.
     Water who?
Water you doing in my house?

Knock, knock.
     Who's there?
Doris.
     Doris who?
Doris open. Come on in!

Knock, knock.
     Who's there?
Candice.
     Candice who?
Candice be the last knock, knock joke?

 


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