Fun
& Games
From "Outside Jokes" book
of wildlife cartoons
(Copyright: Betty C. Grace)
"Hello,
Room Service? I'd like a wake-up call
for
February 2nd."
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(Reprinted by permission
of artist)
Editor's Note:
Copies of the "Outside Jokes" book are on
sale through:
The Nature Shop, Missouri Department of Conservation
P.O. Box 180, Jefferson City, MO 65102-018
or call toll free: 887-521-8632
Crossword
Puzzles
When you have completed the puzzles, you can
click here to find
the answers!
Puzzle
#1
| Across |
Down |
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1. wind instrument
4. one's background
7. renew acquaintance
9. ruined scenery
10. to make smaller
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2. hearing
specialist
3. graveyards
5. kept in position
6. flexibility exercise
8. environment
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Puzzle #2
| Across |
Down |
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1. local law
4. seasonal flight
6. basic framework
7. wide vista
8. beside, next to
9. come together
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1.
pattern of giving
3. limitations
5. harmonize, reconcile
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Puzzle
#3
| Across |
Down |
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1.
working together
4. one who encourages
6. lesser priced
8. have strong feelings
9. a gift giver
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2.
contest
3. delivering babies
5. imitated
7. life's work
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From
book reviews
| Across |
Down |
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3.
one telling story
5. takes chances
6. mentally creative
9. unifying plan
10. bad, evil
11. sharp claws
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1. not real
2. placing stress
4. treated badly
7. bad dream
8. sightseeing visitors
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Jokes
Why don't acrobats work in the winter?
They only do Summer-saults!
What did the left hand say to the right hand?
How does it feel to always
be right?
What rodent always won the basketball game?
The porcupine because it had
the most points!
What do you do when your chair breaks?
Call a chairman!
What do you get when you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?
Big holes all over Australia!
What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer!
How does a witch tell time?
She looks at her witch watch!
What tools do you need in math class?
Multi-pliers!
A couple of school jokes
Teacher: Tommy, I wish you would pay a little more attention.
Tommy: I'm already paying
as little as I can!
Teacher: Tommy, how can you prove the world is round?
Tommy: Don't ask me.
I didn't say it was!
Some Halloween Jokes
Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
No, they eat their fingers
separately!
What kinds of streets do zombies like best?
Dead ends!
Why did the vampire go to the orthodontist?
To improve his bite!
What kind of dogs do vampires like best?
Bloodhounds!
What did one ghost say to the other ghost?
Do you believe in people?
What do you call someone who puts poison in a person's cereal?
A cereal killer!
Why do mummies have trouble keeping friends?
They're too wrapped up in themselves!
Knock, knock finale
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Usher.
Usher who?
Usher wish you'd let me in!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Hawaii.
Hawaii who?
I'm fine, Hawaii you?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Dummy.
Dummy who?
Dummy a favor and go away!
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