Fun
& Games
From "Outside Jokes" book
of wildlife cartoons
(Copyright: Betty C. Grace)
"Ah,
forget her. There are plenty of other
fish in the sea."
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(Reprinted by permission
of artist)
Editor's Note:
Copies of the "Outside Jokes" book are on
sale through:
The Nature Shop, Missouri Department of Conservation
P.O. Box 180, Jefferson City, MO 65102-018
or call toll free: 887-521-8632
Crossword
Puzzles
When you have completed the puzzles, you can
click here to find
the answers!
Puzzle
#1
| Across |
Down |
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1. surrounding environs
5. other teams
7. academic support
8. one's special place
9. weakening economy
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2. top
goals
3. the usual, regular
4. unpaid workers
6. school related
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Puzzle #2
| Across |
Down |
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1. the range, dimension
4. open to suggestion
7. works with wood
9. does software
10. settled differences
11. grows grapes
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2.
speeded-up courses
3. a field of math
5. newspaper writing
6. explain, translate
8. hit to make sound
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Puzzle
#3
| Across |
Down |
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3.
the okay to act
4. complex, civilized
5. paid competitor
7. unplanned
8. planned events
9. size, measurement
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1.
study past societies
2. round course
6. things left behind
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From
book reviews
| Across |
Down |
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2.
laugh provoking
6. made well-known
7. self lifestory
8. over-blown
9. beyond imagining
10. giving 10% to church
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1. an instant solution
3. symptom colletion
4. anti-slavery stance
5. unable to wait
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Jokes (recycled from September 2003)
School jokes
Teacher, I can't solve this problem.
Well, any five-year-old ought to be able to answer that one.
No wonder I can't do it, I'm nearly ten!
Teacher: Did your parents help you with these problems?
Pupil: No, I got 'em all wrong by myself!
Father: What did the teacher think of your idea?
Son: She took it like a lamb.
Father: Really. What did she say?
Son: Baa!
What are you going to be when you get out of school?
An old man!
Kid: I'm not going back to school.
Mom: Why not?
Kid: The teacher doesn't know a thing, all she does is
ask questions!
Mothers' Dictionary
Defense: What you need to have around the yard if you
let the kids play outside.
Dumbwaiter: One who asks if the kids want to order dessert.
Hearsay: What toddlers do when someone mutters a dirty
word.
Independent: What we want are children to be as long
as they do everything we say.
Look out: What it's too late for our kids to do when
it is shouted out
Show off: A kid who is more talented than yours.
Top bunk: Where you should never put a kid wearing Superman
jammies
Whodunit: None of the kids who live in your house.
To finish
Knock. Knock.
Who's there?
Russell.
Russell who?
Russell up something to eat!
Knock. Knock.
Who's there?
Russia.
Russia who?
Russia through your meal and you'll be sick.
Knock. Knock.
Who's there?
Sherwood.
Sherwood who?
Sherwood like to meet you!
Knock. Knock.
Who's there?
Spain.
Spain who?
Spain to have you keep knocking at this door!
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